Getting the Words out: Coming to Terms with Possible Tire Industry Lingo
In the Oxford Dictionary’s latest release of new words, “MacGyver” has finally made the cut. It is a verb that means “making or repairing (an object) in an improvised or inventive way.” And yes, it is capitalized.
The word was 30 years in the making. Actor Richard Dean Anderson played the titular television character for the first time in 1985.
That got me to thinking. Perhaps if I offered up a few possible tire industry-related words now, aging millennials might be using them by 2045. I might even be around to see it happen!
Don’t expect my words to catch on quickly. As with all words-in-the-making, they are products of their times, perhaps a fad at first. If I’m lucky, they will at least start out as slang before they gain any real acceptance.
1. michennial (mich•en•nial), noun: denoting a consumer who purchases tires online from a tire manufacturer. Stereotypically, michennials often refer to vehicle owners reaching young adulthood around the year 2000. They also live in their parents’ houses for what seems like 1,000 years.
Example sentence: Most tire dealers believe michennials are misguided.
2. tarifftino (ta•riff•ti•no), noun: hyperbole or exaggeration, in writing, surrounding the announcement of a tariff, especially on Chinese goods. Often accompanied by vitriol and wild inaccuracies, the word is used to rationalize the need for the tariff, when in reality the claims are nothing more than pulp fiction.
Example sentence: The tarifftino coming from the United Steelworkers led to the government’s implementation of a tariff on consumer tire imports from China.
3. Hallewood (Halle-wood), noun: the nickname for the Las Vegas Motor Speedway every November when Discount Tire store managers gather there to honor their humble patriarch, Bruce Halle. As founder and chairman of the 900-store chain, Halle is revered by his employees; it is not uncommon for them to ask for autographs, or chant “Bruce! Bruce!” during presentations and activities, especially the popular Pit Crew Challenge.
Example sentence: Despite the glitz and glamour of Las Vegas, Hallewood is known for its family-friendly atmosphere.
4. prattery (prat-ter-y), noun: excessive praise given to an individual being honored or singled out in some way. The word originates from 2014, when the ascension of Freda Pratt-Boyer to the presidency of the Tire Industry Association (TIA) fell just short of pandemonium. (When the term is used to describe the adoration bestowed upon Pratt-Boyer by relatives, co-workers at the Purcell Tire & Rubber Co., friends or admirers, it is capitalized.) Unlike its related term “flattery,” prattery will get you somewhere, at least in the tire industry.
Example sentence: TIA’s membership hopefully will heap as much prattery on the incoming president at the Specialty Equipment Market Association Show in Las Vegas as the outgoing president.
5. associopathic (as-socio-path-ic), adjective: antisocial behavior directed at one association by another association in the same industry. It often manifests itself when the associations find themselves at odds politically, resulting in actions lacking in 1)respect, 2) moral responsibility and 3) social conscience by one or both of them. Any display of associopathic behavior is the manifestation of a personality disorder that can only be treated from the inside out — and only if the association exhibiting the behavior acknowledges there is a problem.
Example sentence: Sometimes the Rubber Manufacturers Association and TIA have an associopathic relationship.
Will these words one day join MacGyver in the Oxford Dictionary? It’s possible. If the grammatically incorrect “ain’t” can become a word, why not michennial or prattery?
Widespread use seems to be the key, so if any of you have new words of wisdom you’d like to see in the dictionary one day, let me know. You can’t begin campaigning for them too early, or before you know it other words will get the nod first. Who would have thought Whovian, a fan of the British science fiction television series Doctor Who, would become a word? Or awesomesauce, bromance, comix, gunna (how lazy can you get?), hangry or twerking?
What’s next, strategery? ■
If you have questions or comments, please email me at firstname.lastname@example.org.
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